Fic: Monsters

[interpretthis]

Title: Monsters
Author: interpretthis
Fandom: Lost
Genre: Angst
Pairing: Ben/Juliet, sporting the fun that is uber!evil Juliet
Rating: PG
Summary: Ben liked to think he could control any monster.
Notes: X-posted to henrygalelovers, lost_fanfic, and ficinabottle.

            Ben liked to think he’d never been affected much by the common concerns of most people.  Pain?  Easier to ignore than dwell on.  Love?  And the difference is?  Monsters?  All he had to do to avoid them was make them more afraid of him than he was of them.  Be more cunning, merciless, manipulative than everyone else and monsters become a triviality.

 

            Ben padded through the forest, feet treading lightly on the soft ground, the occasional decaying leaf or twig pushing into the dirt underfoot.  Rain trickled through gaps in the canopy, clinging to the short spikes of his hair, running down the back of his white cotton shirt.  He vaguely registered the pain in his back.  It meant little to him.  If anything it meant survival.  He had won, the cancer was dead, that particular monster was gone for now.  The tumor had been new for Ben.  It wasn’t very often he was faced with a monster he couldn’t control, subjugate, kill.  Not often at all.  But 815 had arrived.  Jack with it.  And he had played every move necessary to get back in control.  Capture the doctor and pull him further and further into his own power until he had the monster by the throat.  But different, softer, enigmatic monsters hid behind the flashy ones, and sometimes through careful deliberation, cleverness, and malice they found a way to win.

 

            There were noises in the jungle around him.  Quiet, strange noises that made the hair on the back of his neck prickle to attention.  His face was a mask of ever-present calm and confidence.  He liked to think that the monsters did not affect him.  Did not bother him in the least because they could do nothing to him.  He was their leader and their superior.  Monsters did not touch him.

 

            He reached his destination as the mouth of a cave became visible, stark black through the vibrant green foliage.  It gaped wide and dark in the precipice.  A smile crept across Ben’s face as he drew closer.  What a solace it would be to return to the dark.  Back to where the monsters lived.  Home. 

 

            As he stepped inside, he took a deep breath, pulling the damp, musty air in to fill his lungs.  The dark pressed at his eyes as he strained to see through into the deep recesses of the cave, his back to the lighted opening.  He trailed into the gloom of the cavern, his arms at his sides, walking calmly and quietly until he found the flat rock he liked to sit on.  He lowered himself and looked around thoughtfully.  He had places that were all his own just like anybody else.  Where he could hide from his own monsters.  Ben liked to think he could control any monster. 

 

            There was a step behind him.  A cool, thin hand on his neck.  The brush of lips sent a nearly indistinguishable shiver down his spine.  Nearly.

 

            “Did I frighten you?” Juliet’s voice was a soft, knowing whisper in his ear.  Her cool breath spawned a web of jolts that crawled from his neck to his breastbone. 

 

            Ben sat quietly, hands on his knees, staring straight ahead to the dimly lit wall of the cavern.

 

            “I’m not afraid.” Voice flat, eyes staring.  He did not turn around.  He had no wish to see Juliet’s eyes.  He did not like to be afraid.

 

            “You’re not afraid.” Juliet’s voice was barely audible.  Even through the silence he could sense her mockery.  Doubt.

 

            “Should I be?” Ben tried to twist his usual sarcasm into his words, but they fell loosely from his tongue, betraying his unease ever so slightly.

 

            “Is that a rhetorical question?” Juliet smirked against his neck.  She was so cold.  Her biting chill always mystified Ben.  He wondered why it surprised him.

 

            Ben’s eyelids fell, closing out the light until there was only comforting blackness.  He took a shaky breath, inhaling the moist, algid air of the cave.  Why, it was nearly as cold as the woman clutching his pained shoulders.  Just nearly.    

 

            Ben liked to think he could control any monster.  Ben liked to think he was always right.  Ben liked to think he was not afraid. 

 

Ben knew he was wrong.

Comments

[sgt-peper.livejournal.com]

Very nice! I like this pairing, and I like how you used it here. xD

[interpretthis.livejournal.com]

Thanks very much! :)

[skinny-bacon.livejournal.com]

Oh wow. wowowowowowow! Oh my goodness. You are my hero! This was every shade of brilliance I have ever read. Absolutely amazing. The beginning completely captivated me; I adored your allusions and references to monsters and Ben's experiences and feelings. Cave = awesome. Evil!Juliet = LOVELOVELOVEAWESOME!!!! Completely amazing. I really really loved this.

Lines that stuck otu to me.

Be more cunning, merciless, manipulative than everyone else and monsters become a triviality.

But different, softer, enigmatic monsters hid behind the flashy ones, and sometimes through careful deliberation, cleverness, and malice they found a way to win.

Her cool breath spawned a web of jolts that crawled from his neck to his breastbone.

Why, it was nearly as cold as the woman clutching his pained shoulders.

And the end was simply amazing. Beautiful. I loved this. So. Much. *super great big hugs*

[interpretthis.livejournal.com]

Thank you so much! I read your comment a good five times - it gives me warm fuzzies :) I'm so glad you enjoyed it, and your feedback is absolutely lovely.
And I just recently realized how incredibly fun it is to write evil!Juliet. So, so meant to be. And who better for her than Ben? Jack. Psh. ;D
Thank you!

[skinny-bacon.livejournal.com]

You definately need to write more Evil!Juliet, and some more UberEvil!Duo as well.

And I just reread this fic again. *sigh* Oh I will have good dreams tonight because of this. Thank you SO much.

[interpretthis.livejournal.com]

I absolutely will - thank you for wanting more! :)
Sweet Benry dreams! ;)

[orangeokapi13.livejournal.com]

That's pretty awesome. I'm so jealous, you write way better than me. Also, you might be converting me into a Ben/Juliet, even though I was never fully against that pairing to begin with. Keep up with the awesome writing!

[interpretthis.livejournal.com]

Thanks so much Katie :) And you write very well too, I promise! Plus - the more you do it, the better you get, so that's great :) And glad I could convert you, whether you liked it in the first place or not. Ben/Juliet rocks The Island, baby! :) Thank you!

[cdsdame.livejournal.com]

Very atmospheric. You could almost feel what Ben was feeling. You have a way of capturing a feeling and making it come to life. A good insight into what goes on inside Ben's head!

[interpretthis.livejournal.com]

Thank you!

[eponine119.livejournal.com]

Excellent job. I like the beginning, where Ben sort of holds himself above it all, like none of it can touch him. You also do a very good job of capturing his voice, so simple, like in that sentence that begins "Why, it was..." That's so him and it's so subtly done.

[interpretthis.livejournal.com]

Thanks very much!